The New York Times to the Rescue

New York Times, we have a problem.

This is the New York Times, say again please.

New York Times, a former governor was caught with his pants down once again, and the mayor-elect’s daughter admitted that she’s a boozer and a druggie.

That’s terrible! What can we do to help?

Both Democrats, both endorsed by the NYT. The Daily News and the Post are sure to make a big deal of it

Any suggestions?

In times of past liberal agenda stress, you used to trot out an article about Nixon, a reliable old villain if there ever was one. But that was so long ago that even the thirtysomethings don’t know who he is.

Well, we can bury those stories in the New York section. Spitzer is basically old news, as he’s done this so many times. The daughter merits a bigger story. We can always write about how brave she is, coming out and all, during the lead.

We still need a villain.

The tea party won’t do, they’re more a collection of the disgruntled than a single figure.

How about Christie?

Christie? What’s he done?

Well, nothing actually. But our people don’t like him, and there still might be a few Democrats over there to say how terrible he is.

Dunno, he won big, and in a very Blue state. He might even run for President in ’16. A negative article about him would be useful to the cause.

And so it came to pass on Christmas Day Anno Domini 2013 that Spitzer’s divorce got 6 column inches of coverage on page 19. The daughter’s story got thirty-nine column inches and two photos on pages 17 and 19. On the front page, the New York Times ran the following headline: “Stories Add Up As Bully Image Trails Christie,” devoting thirty-six column inches and a photograph to it.

They still call themselves a newspaper.

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  • wins32767  On December 26, 2013 at 10:22 am

    I’m honestly not sure how a former governor or child of a politician are more newsworthy than a story about the governing style of a current officeholder. One of them has an impact on the lives of millions of people on a daily basis, the other two have much smaller impacts. I’ve argued the same points with the parties swapped around.

  • luysii  On December 26, 2013 at 12:00 pm

    It wouldn’t be so newsworthy if the NYT hadn’t canonized Spitzer while running and governing, and if the mayor-elect hadn’t run on what a great family he has, and what a family guy he is. What else isn’t he telling us?

    The Mayor of Holyoke has a brother who is a chronic addict, constantly in trouble with the law. Being a (relatively) small town this was very well known before he ran, which didn’t stop him from being elected in his early 20s and then re-elected.

    The problem for the politiconaut and the NYT, is that future canonizations from them will be looked at with suspicion (at last).

    Thanks for commenting

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